It's undeniable - shopping for a new satellite tv system can be tough. Take a look, for example—if you dare—at
Rapid Satellite, a one-stop Internet shopping point for satellite TV. A recent search turned up the following entries: DIRECT
TV DVR80 3-Room 70 Hour DIRECT TV DVR Satellite TV System w/ TiVo (1) DVR80 (2) D10 with Standard Dish, Multi-Switch &
Standard Installation DIRECT TV DVR80 3-Room 70 Hour DIRECT TV DVR Satellite TV System w/ TiVo (1) DVR80 (2) D10 with Triple
LNB Dish & Standard Installation DIRECT TV 3-Room 70 Hour DIRECT TV DVR System w/ TiVo (2) TiVo Receivers (1) Hughes
Director Receiver with Standard Dish, Multi-Switch & Standard Installation DIRECT TV 3-Room System (1) HR10-250 200
Hour (STD) 35 Hour (HDTV) DIRECT TV High Definition DVR w/ TiVo (2) DIRECT TV Receiver System with Triple LNB Dish & Standard
Installation A little help here? Those ads are about as welcoming as a brick wall, and they present us with more acronyms
than the U.S. military. For pure reading pleasure, they rank somewhere between Finnegans Wake and the book of Leviticus. Am
I buying satellite TV service, or naming robots for science fantasy sequels? Relax, Luke Skywalker. Scanning through orbital
space may not be like dusting crops, but we’ll work our way through this thing together. Let’s start with the
first ad. DIRECT TV DVR80 3-Room 70 Hour DIRECT TV DVR Satellite TV System w/ TiVo (1) DVR80 (2) D10 with Standard Dish,
Multi-Switch & Standard Installation Okay, first things first. Direct tv is a national satellite TV subscription service
owned by Hughes Electronics and, in large part, Fox Entertainment. In order to watch Direct tv programming, one must first
by a dish to collect the signals beamed to Earth by the satellite. Then one must buy a set-top box to decode those signals.
Lastly, one must have a TV of some kind to display the imagery represented by those signals. The first ad is trying to sell
us a hardware package that’ll allow us to watch DirecTV, but it adds a few nifty bells and whistles. For example, this
package includes another device called a DVR80. And what exactly is that? It looks like a license plate. Good guess! No,
a DVR80 is a brand of receiver manufactured and sold by RCA. To be more precise, it receives Direct tv signals as well as
TiVo interactions. TiVo is a kind of DVR, or Digital Video Recorder, manufactured by the TiVo company. A Digital Video Recorder
does exactly what it claims to do: It records video, not on tape as a VHS video recorder would, but as digital data in a dedicated
hard drive. The DVR80 is capable of recording up to seventy hours of digital material, just as promised obliquely in the ad.
What the ad doesn’t make clear is that the amount of material the hard drive can store depends on how detailed the information
is. Just as a VHS tape can hold anywhere from two to six hours of material, depending on the image quality, so do DVR image
recordings suffer when recorded at the seventy-hour setting. The DVR80 has Dolby Digital sound capability and comes with a
universal infrared remote control. When sold separately, it retails for anywhere between $100 and $150. The comparison
to VHS tends to minimize what TiVo can do. The hardware and allows for instant replays of live TV, plus the ability to skip
through commercials while a program is airing. The Season Pass feature tracks the user’s favorite shows, even if they
change network time slots, and records them each week automatically. It’s even capable of predicting which unfamiliar
shows the user might like, based on his or her previous recordings. Simply put, TiVo is neato. But what in blue blazes
is a “D10?” Isn’t that Eminem’s Detroit rap posse? No, that would be “D12,” Slim Shady.
A D10 is nothing more than the set-top box that receives Direct tv signals. It features an Advanced Program Guide interface,
and is capable of receiving signals from several Direct tv satellites to the tune of over 225 channels. The box itself costs
about $50 retail. A “multi-switch” is, well, a switch designed to allow more than one set-top box to receive information
from the same satellite dish receiver. Some models feature built-in amplification. The model offered with this package has
three different outputs to send video to TVs in three different areas of a house. Other multi-switches are designed to allow
one satellite dish receiver to provide video to more than one home. As might be easily guessed, Direct tv does not encourage
the sharing of its video offerings by entire neighborhoods of houses. It does, however, promise to install these devices for
you, at a combined package cost of only $47.95. What a bargain! It’s a good thing RapidSatellite doesn’t charge
by the acronym. The second ad presents only one new complication, the “Triple LNB Dish.” A Triple LNB Dish,
also known in Direct tv parlance as a Phase III Mulitsatellite Dish, is an 18” by 20” dish receiver that collects
broadcast signals from three different satellites. Customers with high-definition TV sets will definitely want to upgrade
to Triple LNB, because without it, it’s impossible to receive satellite broadcasts in HDTV. “LNB” stands
for “low-noise block.” It’s the device that hangs off the arm of the satellite dish and looks sort of like
a flashlight. So what does it do? To find out, we first have to crane our necks and stare up into orbit. The Direct tv satellite
at 101 degrees has 32 transponders, numbered 1 to 32 for some reason, each of which sends a group of channels. Back on Earth,
an LNB converter responds to changes in the voltage transmitted by the Direct tv receiver by looking at either the odd- or
even-numbered channels. A Triple LNB Dish, not too surprisingly, includes three LNB converters, each operating independently
of the other two. That way, three different Direct tv receivers can look at three different stations on three different transponders.
Long story short, it means Mom can watch HGTV while Dad checks out Sports Center. Meanwhile, their progeny have gathered around
a third TV set to enjoy Aqua Teen Hunger Force, all at the same time. Thanks to DVR and TiVo technology, it’s entirely
possible that all three programs were recorded weeks ago. As for the third ad, a “Hughes Director” is the standard
receiver offered with basic Direct tv packages. How standard? Many Direct tv vendors are now offering the device free with
purchase of a dish receiver. Still, it’s a perfectly adequate receiver, with many of the features offered by the snazzier
DVR80. While it can’t record video, it does offer a WatchWord search feature that scans through Direct tv program menus
and alerts the user when favorite shows are about to come on. The “HR10-250” receiver is a much pricier alternative,
cashing in at somewhere around a thousand bucks. Still, as Ferris Bueller once noted, “It is so choice. If you have
the means, I highly recommend picking one up.” It contains four tuners and a built-in DVR with TiVo. These four tuners
allow for two HD shows to be recorded at once, even as the user watches a third prerecorded show. The 250 gigabyte hard drive
holds about 30 hours of HDTV, or as many as 200 hours of non-high-def video (at 480 lines of pixels). PCWorld critic Cathy
Lu’s review of the HR10-250 decided, “Cost aside, the Direct tv HD DVR is the best way that I've found to watch
and record HD.” She gave it four and a half stars out of five. That’s pretty good for a machine whose profoundly
uninspired name makes it sound like a tax form.
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